My Three Lords Read online

  “Why should you? What he did is unforgivable.”

  “It is?” I gazed up at his stern face, so entrancing in the silvery light. I had not expected him to take my side against his own friends and cousins.

  “Both of them behaved abominably, and you have every right to be furious with them.”

  “You…you know about the wager?”

  “I do. And I’ve told them I think they’re both a disgrace.”

  I shivered. The Duke mistook my reaction as a physical one to the wind, and wrapped his coat more tightly around me. “On their behalf, I apologize.”

  “You didn’t do anything improper.” Snuggled next to him, the unruly thought floated through my mind that I wished he had, or would. He smelled so lovely, a bit like oranges mixed with wet wool. The heat of his body seemed to send wisps of steam rising from my damp clothing.

  “No, but I knew something along these lines would happen. I knew the Marquis was up to something, and I knew the Earl stood no chance of putting a stop to it. I’m sorry I delayed my arrival by a day.”

  “You have no cause for apology.” But still, I was grateful for it. I cuddled against his strong chest as the drowsy heat stole through my body. He held me securely in his arms.

  “Will you forgive your husband then?”

  “I admit my first response was quite implacably unforgiving. Fortunately, no letter-opener or other sharp instrument was nearby. But now I’ve had time to reflect, my thoughts have taken a different course.”

  “How so?”

  “I believe strongly in facing the truth. It’s never good to lie to oneself.”

  “So very true.” The Duke sounded quite struck by that statement. “What truth is it that you are determined to face?”

  “A simple one. I’ve been thinking on it all night. I married the Earl before God and my father and Lady Chadwick, and I will not back out on a vow. This marriage is my life now.”

  “You’re very honorable.”

  “Besides, unless I join a circus or some such, I should have to return home and that I cannot do. My brothers would laugh at me far too much to tolerate. I would have to commit bodily harm to at least one of them, perhaps even extending to murder, and then I should end up in a ladies’ prison doing my washing by hand. I do not care for that prospect.”

  I noticed a certain quaking in the warm body enfolding me. The Duke was laughing. I didn’t see why he should be so amused.

  “Can you deny the truth of what I say?”

  “Not at all,” he gasped, pulling one hand away from our tight embrace to wipe his streaming eyes. “I merely marvel that a mere slip of a girl should be able to see things with such clarity.”

  “Female eyes work just as well as men’s.”

  “Better, it seems. I knew you were a delightful girl the first time we spoke, at the Allworth’s rout. I never dreamed we’d—” He broke off before he could finish that intriguing thought. He moved to bring his arm back to its previous, enchanting position, then hesitated. “Are you quite warm now?”

  “No,” I answered promptly. “My clothing is still damp, and when the wind finds its way to me, I become dreadfully chilled.”

  “Perhaps your clothing is, that is to say, it might be best if you—” Again he arrested his speech in a most frustrating manner. His unspoken words sent my pulse into a flutter. A new tension arose between us.

  Something else seemed to rise between us too. My legs, curled together, rested on top of his thigh, meaning I was partially in his lap. And in that lap, a burgeoning spear of flesh poked against my leg. The Duke was becoming aroused. That fact made me giddy with an excitement I’d never felt before.

  “Please…ignore that,” he said in a strained voice. “An inevitable consequence of our current circumstances.”

  “I don’t mind,” I told him in a frank manner. “I find the male member quite entrancing.”

  He released a snort of laughter. “Do you indeed?”

  “Yes.” I pressed my leg against it and felt it surge.

  “It seems to find you equally so.”

  Again, shivers swept through me. A silence fell over us and the outer world faded away. In that moment something remarkable took place. The world shifted so the Duke occupied my mind entirely and absolutely, as if no one else existed or had ever existed. Nothing else held any significance.

  I breathed deeply of his presence, which was as intoxicating to me as wine. My skin came alive with awareness. There seemed to be something connecting us, communicating even when no words left our mouths.

  All I knew, all I felt was each breath the Duke took, the rise of his chest, each tiny movement of his muscles. We were alone in a world of our own making, his arms around me, my legs curled on his. The shale beneath us could have been a cloud in heaven. The darkness of the night acted as a curtain shielding us from outsiders. For this moment, only two people existed in the world. One man, one woman.

  I knew he desired me. He knew I desired him. And I sensed, with my new heart that knew only him, a deep, lonely longing in his soul, a grief that cried out for relief.

  Without thought, I turned and pressed the length of my body against him. I felt him shudder with desire, and knew he was fighting the urge to embrace me. Don’t fight it, I told him silently, using nothing but the slow press of my body to make my case. You need me. I need you. And I did need him, oh how I needed him. I needed the comfort of his strong arms, the warmth of his smile, the intensity in his shadowed eyes.

  Silently, we battled. How could he withstand the craving that surged between us? How could he resist the call of my soul to his? He could not, and with a strangled groan he grabbed me to him and brought his head down to mine. As his lips seared mine, I felt my heart shatter into a million sparkles of light.

  Neither the Earl nor the Marquis had ever kissed me.

  Now the Duke kissed the breath from my body and the strength from my limbs. I clung to him and opened my lips to his ferocious explorations. His hands held my face as he delved his tongue deep into my mouth. My soul thrilled to his passionate fervor. I returned it with equal force. We tasted one another with lips and tongues and hands, greedily groping each other’s bodies. The Duke seemed lost in a sort of madness as he plucked the clothing from my body.

  “God forgive me, I need you. I need to see you and feel you.” He groaned. “Every part of you.”

  My skin was so heated by his touch and my own inner fire that I didn’t feel the wind that had bothered me earlier. I rose to my feet, flung off my chemise, and stood proudly before him.

  “Oh, my sweet,” he said, his eyes devouring me. “You’re a goddess.”

  He reached up one hand to pull me back into his lap. His heat enveloped me. The textures of his clothing—stiff wool and fine linen—prickled against my exposed skin in the most exquisite way. I felt a tingling all over my body, but most especially in the tips of my breasts. They stood up with embarrassing eagerness. I became suddenly aware of my nakedness as compared to the Duke, and put my hands to my breasts to hide them.

  But the Duke gently withdrew my hands. I turned my face away, not because I was ashamed of my nakedness, but because my body responded so readily to his gaze. All it took was the Duke’s glance to settle on my bosom, and those nipples of mine leaped to attention like determined little soldiers. What would he think of me and my unmaidenly urges?

  Then all such worries vanished. The Duke touched my nipple with one gentle finger. It was such a light touch, and yet with so much restraint behind it, as if he wanted to ravage me but was allowing himself only one simple touch. The sensation was so enchanting that my other nipple immediately felt the lack. Did he sense how my flesh cried out for him? Did his finger feel the same craving that my nipple felt? Perhaps, for in the next moment he reached for that breast too.

  The Duke, that man of gentle iron, had his hands on my nipples. It defied belief.

  And then came more delight. He moved my legs so I straddled his hips. I felt his hard
length burn against my mound and it made me mad with lust. He ran his hands up and down my arms.

  “Chilled?”

  “No.” I clutched his hands and put them back on my breasts. I felt no chill, only heat and light. His touch was divine to me. His hands seemed to understand my skin and know what my flesh craved.

  We spoke no more words. Perhaps we were afraid to break the spell.

  I rocked against him and saw his head arch back. I knew he felt as I did, that such overwhelming desire was too much to bear, that it would make him burst. I ran my hands down his chest, unbuttoning his waistcoat, opening the white linen shirt he wore. Hard muscles lurked under smooth skin. A light dusting of hair tickled my fingers. I came across little nubs of nipples. I wanted to feel every crevice, every rise of muscle and every twitch of sensitive skin. I wanted to inhale this man, devour him and make him part of me.

  His fingers played with my nipples. I moaned as a spasm shot through me. There was something I wanted to tell him, but my desire was so great I could not utter a coherent word. I lost myself in his eyes, dark pools like tunnels to his heart. We gazed at each other, soul to soul.

  A shadow passed over him.

  “We must not—” He tried to put me away from him, but I would have none of it.

  I boldly reached inside his breeches and took his manhood into my greedy hands. It was a mighty thing, its girth so great my fist barely reached around it. In my grip, it grew to an even more substantial size. It nigh to scorched my hand, so hot was that spear of flesh. From the moment I touched it, all thoughts fled my mind save one. I wanted him inside my body.

  All thoughts of proper behavior, of decorum, of my former self…all were gone. I was a woman craving a man, nothing more.

  And I knew that man wanted me. As I stroked his flesh, I gazed into his feverish eyes and saw how he lusted, and how he fought that lust.

  I inched myself forward so his member brushed against the tender inner part of my thighs. My belly clenched with anticipation. His body went rigid.

  “You tempt me beyond bearing,” he muttered under his breath. I felt fierce joy at those words, and a dizzying sense of power. Of course he couldn’t resist me. Not when my hand danced up and down his shaft, testing its eager response. Not when I arched my back to brush my nipples against the muscular expanse of his chest. Not even his clothing could stand in my way.

  His thickened shaft spilled from his opened breeches. I claim no knowledge of how they came to be unbuttoned. His cravat was long gone, his shirt loose, displaying his strong throat and powerful chest. It rose and fell with his rapid, almost hoarse breathing. In the moonlight, sweat glistened on his skin. His eyes bored into mine with an intensity that took away my breath. He looked half-crazed with desire and altogether magnificent.

  His cock nudged the curls that guarded my cunt. I arched my hips in greeting, spreading my knees farther apart to entice a visit. I felt a magical rhythm undulate my body. It was as if a siren from the deep possessed me. As my thighs gripped his, my upper half moved in a sensual dance, my arms rising to gather my hair over my head. With a primal knowledge I didn’t know I possessed, I wove a web of lustful invitation, of wicked bewitchment, of feverish enchantment. Could he resist? He tried, I saw how he tried. But in that moment, on that spot, neither one of us could withstand the need that drew us together.

  In one strong, gloriously forceful motion, he flipped me over onto my back. I gasped in surprise as the rough wool of his coat scraped my bottom. He braced himself over me.

  “You push me too far.” He choked out the words before roughly pressing my legs apart with his knee.

  I spread them even farther apart and arched my body to meet his.

  And then came the moment that shattered my world. He drove into me, his massive cock claiming me to the utmost reaches of my body and soul.

  “I—” Another powerful thrust and the truth broke in blinding waves. “I lo—”

  But suddenly I had no breath, no words. I barely knew where I was. The depth of my madness frightened me, and I gripped the coat beneath me to anchor myself. But the next deep stroke of his cock chased away all fear.

  He began a slow corkscrewing of his hips that made my body sing with frenzied joy. I moved and danced against him. This seemed to drive him mad. He stilled my hips in an iron grip that left me no choice but to ride the sweet rising wave. “I… I…”

  Deep inside me he plunged, so deep and far. It was as if a dam had broken inside him and no longer could he hold himself back. He took me with desperate hunger, with a ferocious, endless need. No longer was he the restrained and commanding Duke. Together, we’d unleashed the savage within. And the siren in me urged him on. More, more, more…

  Until the pleasure exploded inside and I wailed my ecstasy to the moon and the stars and the man who ruled me body and soul.

  The blissful waves swept across me, sharp and deep and complete. This time, I didn’t transport to another realm. Rather, I stayed where I was, joined with my Duke, as we whirled together into a magical union. I felt his body shudder with his release. I heard him give a harsh cry of joy. And I knew, with all my heart, that this was the only man I would ever truly love.

  I loved the Duke. I had perhaps done so since our first meeting at the rout. He’d never entirely left my mind since then, even appearing to me during moments of ecstasy. I knew he must love me, too, else how should I feel so complete in his arms?

  But he did not declare it. To the contrary, as soon as his throes of passion ended, a dark shadow descended on his face and he rolled onto his back.

  “What I’ve done is wrong, very wrong. I deserve utter condemnation and scorn.”

  “No! I love you.”

  He shifted restlessly on our makeshift blanket. “That’s impossible. I’ve sworn never to love.”

  “You cannot swear such a thing. I think I loved you from the first moment we spoke.”

  “You must stop immediately. It cannot be.”

  I hit him on the fleshy part of his upper arm, where I knew it wouldn’t hurt.

  “I can’t and I won’t. And I’m very stubborn. When I make up my mind about a thing, it never changes. I love you. I always will.”

  He shook my words away as if they were horseflies. “And your husband? My heir? What have I done to him?”

  “Don’t speak of him!” My anger had faded in the presence of much stronger emotions, the way a candle is outshone by the sun. But still, I did not want to think of him. “Dorchester is more of a brother to me, a very naughty brother indeed. I imagine he feels much the same toward me. Is that not the best one can hope for? Our marriage was an arranged one, after all.” I shivered as a wisp of cool air whispered against my cheek. “Will you hold me closer, please, Your Grace?”

  “Are you becoming chilled?” He hurried to bundle me up more warmly. I basked in his care and concern. “I find it impossible to deny you. And yet I must.”

  I buried my face in his chest. I knew what he referred to. This glorious communion could never happen again.

  “We should row back to the house.” But his tone held no conviction.

  “No, no,” I said quickly. “I’m sure I would become far too chilled out on the water. We’re much warmer here, at least until the sun rises.”

  “And when the sun rises, what then?”

  “Perhaps it won’t do so,” I said, desperately. “In the meantime, we can pretend we’re gypsies living in the open air, free as the wind, without a care in the world.”

  “What a lovely thought.” And so for the next stretch of time we imagined ourselves to be carefree wanderers. In our imaginations, we made a bonfire and danced around it. We ate berries and hunted geese, which we roasted on a stick over our fire. We bathed in streams and slept under the stars. We gave ourselves a caravan of ragtag children.

  It was that last addition that brought our play to an end. The Duke’s face sobered at the mention of children. “I should have been more cautious during our lovemaking. If
you are with child, I will never forgive myself.”

  “If that is what the Lord desires, that is what will be.” In my heart, I knew I would be delighted to bear his child. The complications of such a prospect were daunting, but so were the joys. “Don’t you love me a little?” I whispered.

  “It cannot be.” His bleak tone told me our brief interlude of fantasy was over.

  Shortly after that, the first hint of gray on the horizon augured the onset of day. Under normal circumstances, I adored watching the sunrise. But this time, it brought a dreadful tightening to my belly. I squeezed my eyes shut, hoping it would be full dark when I opened them again. But the sun was relentless in its slow encroachment on my happiness.

  “We must leave now,” said the Duke, and this time I did not argue. I rose silently to my feet, which, of all parts of my body, were the most numb from cold. He buttoned his greatcoat around me and led me to the rowboat. Together, we heaved it into the lake, then he swung me into it so my feet wouldn’t touch the water. He pushed off from shore and jumped into the boat. I watched every movement with greedy lust. He was graceful yet powerful, strong yet considerate. Everything he did made me love him more deeply.

  He saw me devouring him with my eyes and gave me a chiding look. “Behave yourself, now.”

  “I didn’t do anything!”

  “It’s that look in your eyes, you must know what a fire it lights in me.”

  “Does it?” I asked innocently.

  “You bring to life things within me that I thought I’d banished, things I’ve sworn never to—”

  He snapped shut his mouth, as if determined to say no more. He set himself to rowing. I watched the oars dip in and out of the black water, making a silvery sound. I remembered how I’d first spotted him, unconscious and slumped.

  “You never answered my question,” I exclaimed. “What was wrong with you when I spotted you in the lake…” I trailed off. His eyes met mine with a deadly seriousness that turned my body to ice. “No.” I whispered. I didn’t even know what I was saying “no” to, only that it was something terrible.